This is the dilemma I'm currently faced with.
I'm not sure exactly how to proceed from here, as my usual method is to bash skulls together and keep on walking, letting the devil count the bodies. But I find myself not wanting this to happen now.
Emotions are running rampid through my head as I try to fit the pieces of this puzzle together.
On the one hand I want to kill whatever chance of reconciliation is left so this will never be an issue again. On the other I don't want to live with the weight of never knowing if things could have worked out for the rest of my life.
So what do I do?
Honestly, I have no idea. I've turned the other cheek until my rear looks like eternal road rash has set in.
I have been lied to and about, used, manipulated and deceived, all by the same person.
But people change, right? They grow up, the grow wiser, the learn remorse, and they ask for forgivenes.s. Or is this just a fairytale that, for some unbeknown reason, I suddenly believe in?
Maybe I'm going to be the biggest dumbass in history but I am going to try, one last time, to forgive and being the mending process that will blossom into an even stronger and closer friendship then ever before.
Or I could just be making a terrible decision because of the alcohol I have consumed tonight.
Either way, I'll be sure to let you know what happens, After all, this is my blog, it's what I do.
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